5 Tips for Landing an Epic Gift
Photo Credit: Erin Nicole Graf
An effective capsule closet, one that guarantees out-the-door outfit solutions that make you feel fantastic every day, is hinged on a solid wardrobe core. Expertly crafted accessories and signature jewelry strengthen this core considerably.
Sartorial objects d’art do not come often, nor do they come cheap. Such investments must be plotted, planned and timed impeccably – which brings me to Mother’s Day.
Mother’s Day is a critical wardrobe core strengthening opportunity. I will not let you blow this.
Here is my well-oiled, time-tested strategy to ensure that you end the first Sunday in May with a prize befitting your child bearing, sleep deprived, patience torn, sacrificial breast and belly exquisiteness.
Like, right after tax day.
1. Start Early
If you are embarking on this process today – we may be too late. Men are not trained to read brains. It is your responsibility to approach this mission with thoughtful consideration to what you want and how to get it. I'd advise spending the three weeks leading up to Mother’s Day researching by day and – ahem – wifing by night.
Additionally, volunteer back rubs, ask him if he lost weight, and exclaim, “you’re so smart!” at least once.
Toddlers work best.
2. Recruit Support
Toddlers are awesome at telling people things you told them not to repeat. Work this in your favor. First, emphatically make your toddler promise not to tell Daddy about that time in Target when the check out boy told Mommy that she was the prettiest Mommy he’d ever seen. Now wait one week and show toddler a picture of your prize. Say “Isn’t that pretty for Mommy?” Make toddler promise not to show the picture to Daddy or tell Daddy how much Mommy wants the prize for Mother’s Day. When toddler asks why, tell toddler you are sad because the prize is so expensive. Try to fake cry a little.
Size 37.5; 100mm heel; nude patent leather Christian Louboutin Demi You pump, specifically.
3. Be Very, Very Specific
Now that we've laid the groundwork it's time to clarify exactly what we want for our Mother's Day prize. Print out a picture and information about your prize and tape it to the refrigerator. Circle the prize in red. Specify size, color, retailer and shipping deadline. No need to be clear on price.
If you have a husband who insists on selecting his own gifts, present him with three options. Include the prize you want and two lovely but more expensive ideas.
If he can afford it chances are you can, too.
4. Have a Back Up Plan
Let’s pretend it’s May 8. You put in the wife work, planted hints and provided impeccable purchase instructions. Surprise! Daddy bought Mommy a sunflower sweater and wind chimes.
Momma, promise me you’ll buy that beautiful prize for your damn self. You have my permission. You earned it and your capsule wardrobe will thank you.
Whatever you do, don't tell Matt I want these gifts. They are just too much.
Happy Mother’s Day! Hope you get something pretty.
Don't forget to show your love by clicking that little heart down below.
Xoxo ❤️ Jenn